Dealing with Difficult Relationships-Thoughts and Reflections on Torah Reading 60

Shabbat Shalom saints of the Most High.

 

May you, your families, and your fellowships be well and blessed in the perilous times we’re living.

 

Central Themes and Life Lessons of Torah Reading 60

 

I’ve entitled this reading study: Dealing with Difficult Relationships-Thoughts and Reflections on Torah Reading 60.

 

The central themes and life lessons to be learned from our Torah Reading today, which happens to be the 60th reading in our 3-year Torah Reading Cycle, contained in Exodus 21:1-22:24, include, but are not limited to:

 

• Proper restitution is to be paid to those who are wronged by another.
• Love of neighbor as one loves themselves.
• Existing in a Godly society and dealing with ungodly behavior and relationships.
• Raising Godly children to be Godly adults.

 

 

I invite you to read Exodus/Shemot-22:24 at your leisure to get a full sense of what this reading is all about.

 

Yeshua-focused Torah Living Application

 

Now, I will say from the outset that a general read of this parashah will appear irrelevant to our 21^st-century western sensibilities. Human-trafficking incidents aside, slavery is illegal and much of the west is not agrarian. Unfortunately, denominationalism and pretty much all the secular world see Torah as archaic and irrelevant to the world today. But when we stop and look at this and future readings from a Yeshua-focused Torah Living perspective, these readings most certainly are essential teachings and instructions for any with eyes to see and ears to hear and willing hearts to obey. And I will make the critical connections between our reading and Yeshua’s teachings as we progress along in our study here today.

 

Let’s take a tour of this week’s reading.

 

Relationships Surrounding Slavery in Ancient Israel

 

 

In verses 21:1-10, we have put before us the terms of service as it relates to Hebrew slaves. Any Hebrew slave is to be released in the 7th year (I.e., the Shmita year). And contrary to ANE conventional practices, the terms of Hebrew slavery are determined by relationships. Family relations and Master-Servant relationships.  

 

Of note is the relationship that exists between the Hebrew slave and the master that he loves. The servant that loves his master and spouse may remain in permanent service and not accept release in the 7th year. A ritual is thus performed whereby the servant who desires to remain in the service of the master he loves by having an awl (a small, pointed tool used for piercing holes, particularly in leather) pierced through his ear lobe (21:5-6).

 

The prophetic shadow picture depicted here cannot be denied. Shaul described himself as a servant (I.e., a “Doulos”) of Yeshua. We who are Yah’s elect, are bonded to our Master Yeshua because of our love for Him and His Father. We are bound to Yeshua because of His atoning sacrifice and His intercessory ministry. Thus, we serve our Master faithfully and lovingly.

 

Summary Execution of Murderers

 

In verses 21:12-14, Yah instructs that any who smites another to death (I.e., murders another) shall be summarily executed. This judgment is primarily focused on those who willfully or negligently murder their neighbor.

 

Making Sense of God’s Position on Slavery

 

It should be mentioned at this juncture that many question Yah’s morals when it comes to the harshness of His judgments against certain acts. I recall growing up in the Baptist Church of my youth debates over Yah’s seeming permissiveness or endorsement of slavery. But when one understands the heart of the Father and becomes a student of Yeshua’s teachings, it becomes evident that Yah never endorsed or advocated slavery for His people. What Yah was doing, as it related to the issue of slavery in the nation of Israel was taking the practice of slavery in the ANE (the Ancient Near East) and bringing order and morality to it.

 

Yah would rather his people not engage in slavery at all such that no human would ever be subject to another human being. In fact, the only being Yah’s people should ideally be subject to is Him!

 

The other thing to consider here, which itself is controversial, is that slavery in certain situations in Hebrew society did offer opportunities for the destitute to receive a livable level of subsistence, as well as provide the master with needed labor and assistance to attend to the needs of his estate.

 

Yah’s way of conducting slavery was that He removed the mistreatment of servants and provided both servants and masters a humane framework in which to operate.

 

And with this picture in mind, one should see the beauty of Godly servitude that is modeled here. The symbiotic, loving relationship between master and his servant(s) or “Doulos”. The “Doulos” or servant becomes a permanent member of the master’s family and never has to worry about the well-being of him and his family again.

 

Father Reiterates Some of His 10-Words

 

We find in verses 21:12-17 a reiteration of commandments 5, 6, and 8 (chapter 20). Abba sees certain degrees of violations of these 3-cited commandments as serious enough to merit the offender’s death. Clearly, the integrity of the family unit is supremely at stake here. And we see throughout the whole of scripture that the institution of the family and of marriage are very important to Him. Thus, any actions to disrupt or destroy the fabric of the family unit are not to be tolerated by the nation.

 

The prohibition against murder (specifically harming one’s parents) is once again mentioned in these verses. Our Master taught that when one embarks upon a life of violence, his or her death is the eventual outcome.

 

Consequently, the Master stood firmly behind the mitzvot to honor one’s parents (Matthew 15:14; Mark 7:10-13). Interestingly, Abba commanded that we honor our father and mother, but love our neighbor as ourselves (Matthew 19:19). He did not command us to “love” our parents. And this certainly is a salient point. Many of us, especially those of us in this beloved Faith Community of ours, may find ourselves at odds with our parents. The relationship I had with my mother, who passed away in 2020, was a 4-decade-long struggle. Yet I always made sure I honored her. I respected her. I revered her as my mother. And to a greater or lesser extent, I loved my mother. We just didn’t get along. She did not approve of my wife, and she certainly did not approve of my Faith. And I believe Yah was cognizant of the fact that adult children may fall out of favor with their parents for whatever reason(s). Nevertheless, it was imperative, for the integrity of the sacred family institution, that every child honor his or her parents.

 

Love Your Neighbor as you Love Yourself

 

In verses 21:18-19, Yah deals with the issues surrounding proper compensation for damages done to one’s neighbor.

 

There is a spiritual application that is attached to these mitzvot whereby the injured party is to be properly compensated. Their pain and suffering are fairly addressed. And proper addressing of these concerns is extremely important to maintaining the secure and peaceful fabric of a Godly society and community. We are to treat others as any human would desire to be treated (I.e., love your neighbor as your love yourself).

 

Part of loving one’s neighbor as one loves themselves is meeting the responsibility of righting any wrongs one does to or against their neighbor. Especially wrongs that are perpetrated against members of our Faith community. We are to love our brothers and sisters as we love ourselves.

 

When Harm is Done to the Unborn

 

Skipping down to verses 21:22-25, we come upon mitzvot that are related to the miscarriage of an unborn child who dies because of a scuffle between two other individuals who somehow encounter the pregnant mother. Abba instructs that those involved in the scuffle that led to the death of the unborn child, properly compensate the parents for their loss, in accordance with the claim filed in court by the woman’s husband.

 

If the mother herself suffers some degree of harm to her person in addition to that of losing her baby, the guilty ones must render equitable compensation for all injuries. Thus, we get the well-known phrase: “An eye for an eye; a tooth for a tooth.” The rabbis considered this phrase legal technical terminology for equitable compensation.

 

Many commentators down through the centuries have sought to put some identifiable meaning to these mitzvot. Some of them have gone so far as to suggest that these mitzvot were inserted by individuals other than Moshe for the purposes of bringing the Hebrew set of civil laws up to the standards of other ANE (I.e., ancient near east) legal standards. But this is pure foolish, even heretical, thinking. These mitzvot were obviously given by Yah to inform the Hebrew legal system of the necessity to always render judgments that fit the crime and to incite Godly justice.

 

Master shed some light on this issue in Matthew 5:38-48 (I.e., part of His Sermon on the Mount). He causes His disciples to look at and act on such life situations from a perspective that was often different from that of their religious leaders. Instead of seeking retribution and compensation from those that did evil against them, Master instructed them to do the opposite. Turn the opposite cheek toward them. That they seek no retribution. No compensation. To instead love them unconditionally.

 

These are indeed hard sayings because our natural inclination, even as Yah-fearers, is to make those who harm us pay for their crimes against us.

 

The thing that we as Netzarim must learn to do when we come upon such mitzvot is to recognize what our Master is saying to us about them. Just because they are recorded in Yah’s Torah, doesn’t mean we must pursue the Mitzvot’s explicit course of action. For in many cases, Yah does give His people leeway on how to handle the situation from a love-your-neighbor perspective. Like, you don’t have to sue someone who’s done you harm. We don’t have to seek compensation or a pound of flesh from the one who has injured us. We are, however, required to love the one who behaves as our enemy as we love ourselves.

 

Abortion and Torah

 

The last thing I’m compelled to mention about this mitzvah has to do with our present-day abominable epidemic which is abortion. Although not specifically mentioned in Torah, abortion is an abominable act that warrants action against those that practice it. Clearly, Abba places tremendous value on the life of the unborn. Yet in this present 21^st-century western society, one can be canceled by a woke mob if one speaks against abortion. The rallying cry of the abortionists is of course that women have the right to choose what goes on with their bodies.

 

Present-day denominationalists and Jewish leaders have turned a blind eye and a deaf ear to this plague. No longer is there going out from the pulpits of this nation a clarion call to protect the unborn life. No longer is there a denouncement of this abominable practice. No longer are pastors, preachers, teachers, rabbis, and such, preaching the bible and declaring that the wholesale slaughter of the unborn child by the peoples of western and eastern nations is simply begging for Yah’s judgment and wrath to overtake them.

 

Judgment and the wrath of Yah are most certainly coming to the nations of the world that practice the abominable act of Moloch worship, which is modern-day abortion. The only solution and way to head off the coming judgment tide are for the peoples of this world to humble themselves, pray, seek the glorious face of Yehovah, and turn from their insidiously wicked ways (2 Chronicles 7:14).

 

But let’s be real here. That’s never gonna happen is it? No. Humanity has always wanted to do what it always wanted to do. For the heart of man is deceitful above all things, and it is desperately evil and corrupt (Jeremiah/Yermi’yahu 17:9).

 

All that is left for us to do at this juncture of human history is to watch, pray, and walk by our faith (Habakkuk 2:4). And let us not overlook being persistent in our telling of the truth and warning the modern nations of Yisra’el as to what’s ahead if they persist in their evil ways. Shaul said to a group of Ephesian elders:

 

Wherefore watch ye, remember that by the space of three years I ceased not to admonish every one night and day with tears (Acts 20:31; ASV).

 

The Prophet Ezekiel through the inspiration of Yah’s Ruach HaQodesh wrote:

 

Again the word of the LORD came unto me, saying, ² Son of man, speak to the children of thy people, and say unto them, When I bring the sword upon a land, if the people of the land take a man of their coasts, and set him for their watchman: ³ If when he seeth the sword come upon the land, he blow the trumpet, and warn the people; ⁴ Then whosoever heareth the sound of the trumpet, and taketh not warning; if the sword come, and take him away, his blood shall be upon his own head. ⁵ He heard the sound of the trumpet, and took not warning; his blood shall be upon him. But he that taketh warning shall deliver his soul. ⁶ But if the watchman see the sword come, and blow not the trumpet, and the people be not warned; if the sword come, and take any person from among them, he is taken away in his iniquity; but his blood will I require at the watchman’s hand. ⁷ So thou, O son of man, I have set thee a watchman unto the house of Israel; therefore thou shalt hear the word at my mouth, and warn them from me. ⁸ When I say unto the wicked, O wicked man, thou shalt surely die; if thou dost not speak to warn the wicked from his way, that wicked man shall die in his iniquity; but his blood will I require at thine hand. ⁹ Nevertheless, if thou warn the wicked of his way to turn from it; if he do not turn from his way, he shall die in his iniquity; but thou hast delivered thy soul. (Eze 33:1-9 KJV)

 

By virtue of our chosen status beloved, we have been assigned the job of not only imaging Yehovah and being a light to this wicked world, but also being watchmen on the wall. And as long as we have this platform and any others that Abba will avail to us, we will watch and warn and admonish.

 

 

Confronting Claims that Torah was Plagiarized from other ANE Sources

 

Many so-called bible scholars have cast doubts upon the genuineness of the Torah and its mitzvot, by claiming that older ANE nations had similar laws and ways in place well before Israel became a nation. I would say this in response: We must always bear in mind the lineage and origin of these other nation peoples. Every person and nation had its beginning with Adam and Eve. And we know from Scripture that Yah articulated His ways—His Torah—to the patriarchs well before it was codified by the pen of Moshe.

 

Father said of Avraham that “he obeyed His voice, and kept His charge, His commandments, His statutes, and His laws” (Genesis/Beresheit 26:5).

 

“For I have known him (him being Avraham), to the end that he may command his children and his household after him, that they may keep the way of Yehovah, to do righteousness and justice; to the end that Yehovah may bring upon Abraham that which He hath spoken of him” (Genesis/Beresheit 18:19).

 

Yah described Noah as “a righteous man, and perfect in his generations. And that he walked with Elohim” (Genesis/Beresheit 6:9).

 

Where did Noah learn to walk with Elohim and live a righteous life? No doubt from his forefathers, all who go back to Adam and Eve (Genesis/Beresheit 5:28). And it was Yah who taught Adam His Torah. And Adam taught Cain and Abel Yah’s Torah and so on.

 

So, these supposed older nations and their laws (e.g., the Hammurabi Laws) were obvious derivations of Yah’s original Torah that was taught to the patriarchs who passed them down to their descendants.

 

The Spirit and Truth Relevance of Yah’s Torah

 

As mundane and outdated as many of these mitzvot may appear to most 21^st-century western sensibilities, the spirit and truth of them remain all the more relevant to mankind even today. We may not subsist in an agrarian society today as our ancient Hebrew cousins did back in the day. But our reading does teach us to always-always-always keep in mind how our actions will affect others. We must have such a love for others in our community and society that in everything we do, we’re to look out for the wellbeing of others. This is the level of Torah living—the spirit and truth of Torah living—that our Master Yahoshua requires His disciples to walk in. That is, if they intend to make it into the Kingdom.

 

Dealing with Greed and Covetousness in Relationships-Zacchaeus Has an Encounter with Yeshua Messiah

 

Skipping on over to verse 22:1, we find Yah once again addressing the stealing or taking of another’s property and the appropriate restitution to be rendered.

 

The principle we must be cognizant of here is that this mitzvah goes well beyond the simple stealing of an ox or sheep, the dispensing of the stolen article(s) for another’s own gain, and then the proper restitution that is to be rendered unto the victim of the theft.

 

We should be reminded here of the beautiful story of the Publican Zacchaeus (Luke 19:1-10).

 

It was as a result of his encounter with Master Yahoshua Messiah that Zacchaeus was convicted and pledged to give half of his possessions to the poor and to restore unto any whom he may have, during the course of his work as a publican, defrauded four-fold (Luke 19:8; cf. 2 Samuel 12:6).

 

And this goes even beyond the sinful acts of stealing and fraud. It goes to the very heart of the matter which defines Yeshua-focused Torah living. And the heart of the matter has to do with greed and covetousness.

 

Yahoshua warned His disciples to beware—to be on guard—against every form of greed (Luke 12:15). Thus, He encouraged any who would seek to be His disciple to sell all their possessions and give the proceeds to the poor, and then follow Him. In so doing, they would be storing up for themselves treasures in heaven (Luke 11:41; 12;33; 18:22).

 

Are we, beloved, willing to do such a thing? Are we willing to divest ourselves of all the material things we possess, and follow Him? Indeed, a tall order indeed. I don’t know of anyone who has actually done such a thing. But this admonishment is certainly something to think seriously about. Especially in these last and evil days.

 

Preserving Life When Possible

 

Moving on to the next three verses, (22:2-4), Yah addresses acts of breaking and entering thievery, in particular where the homeowner kills the perpetrator. Torah declares that the homeowner in this case would not be guilty of murder, as he was protecting himself, his family, and his possessions. However, the text goes on to speak to the nuance of when the perpetrator is killed by the homeowner during daylight hours.

 

The rabbis debate the rote understanding of this passage, suggesting that in the daylight, one may be able to make peace with the thief (I.e., reason with the thief face-to-face, with each party being able to see one another. But we know that making peace with a criminal is not always possible. Although the homeowner, with sufficient deterrence, may convince the thief to go his way and do no further harm to him or his family.

 

The bigger point to be gained here is this Godly concept of preserving life whenever possible. Life is precious. The rabbis make a special mention of the fact that human life is all the more precious since man was made in Yehovah’s image. But the fact still remains, that all life is precious. Even the life of a criminal.

 

When addressing the group of contemptible Pharisees, Yeshua asked them when challenged about His healing someone on the Sabbath:

 

“…I will ask you one thing: Is it lawful on the sabbath days to do good, or to do evil? To save life, or to destroy it” (Luke 6:9; KJV)?

 

This Torah passage goes on to address the capture of the thief and the restitution that he or she must make to the homeowner. And if the thief is unable to make the prescribed restitution, he or she is to be sentenced to a term of servitude or slavery.

 

Righteous and Just Judges

 

Dropping down to verses 22:8-15, Yah addresses situations where borrowed articles are stolen and the borrower is liable to make restitution to the owner for the stolen articles.

 

Many English translations say that the borrower in question must appear before the judges, while other translations such as the LXX read the borrower must stand before Elohiym, to see whether or not the borrower misappropriated the stolen articles.

 

It’s more likely that the entities making this determination are human judges who are acting on behalf of Elohiym. And we can see mentioned throughout Torah, that judges were expected to be men of the greatest integrity, and honesty, individuals who despise bribes or unjust gain; men of truth; strong men of moral standing (reference Exodus/Shemot 18:21).

 

Indeed, the judges that our Torah reading is referring to were the lot of leaders that Jethro/Yitro advised Mosheh to appoint as rulers over the people of Yisra’el.

 

The billion-dollar question that must be considered here is: Do the people of this nation have judges sitting on various benches throughout various jurisdictions of this nation who match the qualities Yah requires for one to be a true judge? And I guess the answer to that question is for the most part no. And if yes, they are indeed few and far between.

 

It falls, to some lesser or greater degree, to our Faith leaders to be the voice of Godly reason and speak Yah’s Words of Truth to the people that Yah has placed under their care and oversight.

 

Recall that the Yerushalayim apostles starting off, appointed seven men of honest report, who were filled with the Ruach HaQodesh and wisdom, to oversee the day-to-day business of the assembly, and which included adjudicating conflicts between members of the assembly (Acts 6:3).

 

All matters involving two parties and a loss were to be brought before Yah, which translates into Yah’s righteous judges. And Yah, through these righteous judges, would resolve the matters, such that the one Yah has condemned would be subject to restitution of the victim double that which the borrower had lost through thievery.

 

If we were to take this principle to its ultimate end, the borrower who has a loaner’s articles stolen from him or her stands as the responsible party in this situation. It ultimately falls to the borrower to make the situation right with the lender. The lender deserves his/her stuff back.

 

Indeed, loaning things to a brother or sister is always a dicey business. And in most cases, if we are inclined to loan that which we possess to another who is in need, the Master instructed us to give unto the one in need and not demand it back from them (Luke 6:30).

 

Now, this works for many items that we may own and that a brother or sister may be in need of. And we, with a caring and loving heart, are willing to loan to them. But Yeshua instructs us to give and not expect those items back. Well, it’s one thing to loan someone a piece of equipment or some other personal item and not expect it to be returned. But it’s entirely a whole other thing to loan someone, let’s say our car, and not expect it back. Right? Items such as a car are not only extremely valuable items to the owner, they are often vital possessions that aid the owner and his family in getting through life day by day. So, what’s a person to do in order for them to stay within the spirit of what Yeshua taught regarding the borrowing or giving of personal items to one who is in need?

 

Well, in such cases as the car that we’ve mentioned, it would behoove us to get to the heart of a brother or sister’s need. What I mean by this is to determine why that brother or sister needs to borrow our vehicle which may be the only source of transportation we have. It’s not reasonable to give such a commodity away. What happens, let’s say, if our vehicle is stolen or damaged while in our neighbor’s possession?  And if we were to give this valuable commodity to our neighbor, how do we attend to the transportation needs of our family?

 

Well, maybe the Godly solution to this dilemma is to personally transport the one in need and help tend to their original needs (Matthew 5:41). Go the extra mile and help the one who is in need as opposed to handing over to them such a critical article.

 

In any case, we are to love our neighbor as we love ourselves. Which means that we are willing to do what we can to help the one in need.

 

As borrowers, however, it falls to us to see to it that whatever befalls us personally, or the borrowed articles, we quickly restore the borrowed item to its owner (Proverbs 3:27-28).

 

Yah’s People Should Not Find Themselves in Need

 

Scripture speaks more to giving than it does to borrowing. This says to me that, as Yah’s chosen, if we are faithful to our charter and obedient to Yah’s Word, we shall never be in need. For Yah has promised that He will command the blessing upon us in our storehouses and in all that we set our hand to do if we but fear Him and keep His commandments—His instructions in righteousness—seek His Kingdom and His righteousness (Deuteronomy/Devarim 28:1-8).

 

The Value of Chastity and the Sin of Fornication

 

In verses 22:16-17, Yah addresses the case of a man who has intimate relations with an unbetrothed virgin. Yah requires that man seek to marry the woman if the woman’s father consents to the marriage. If the woman’s father rejects the marriage proposal, then the man must instead make financial restitution to the girl’s father.

 

Why would father require such a thing? Today, premarital sex is rampant, and hardly any such encounters between men and women actually result in marriage, much less any restitution being paid to the woman’s family by the man responsible for the transgression.

 

Yah and ANE families valued virginity, especially in their daughters until such time they got married. Men seeking a bride desired their would-be wife to be chaste and a virgin. In many cases, a daughter loses much of any opportunity to be married off if she was not a virgin. If the fornicating man is not permitted to marry their daughter who has lost her virginity to him, they face an extremely challenging time marrying her off. In fact, that daughter may end up residing in her father’s home indefinitely.

 

Today, there is no such concern among parents for their daughters and sons. Premarital sex is all too often an expected activity that every parent will fact as it relates to their children. And society is such that premarital sex is not only encouraged but is expected. Premarital sex has become an abominable right of passage in modern western society.

 

In the case of this passage, the daughter would have lost her virginity to the fornicating man. And in Hebrew circles, virginity is a virtue as just stated (Isaiah 62:5).

 

The concept of virginity is a Godly one. The Apostle Shaul wrote that his Corinthian readers were espoused to one husband and they were viewed as a chaste virgin unto Messiah (2 Corinthians 11:2).

 

A virgin in essence has not been defiled by any man. She is pure and chaste.

 

Yah required that the biological mother of our Master Yahoshua be a virgin for obvious reasons (Isaiah 7:14; Matthew 1:23-27).

 

Beloved, it’s so important that we instill Godly virtues and Yah’s Torah into our children, even from the very start of their young lives. Both our sons and daughters.

 

Our daughters need to understand the importance that Godly virtue will and must play in their lives. The sacredness of marriage and the evil and sin of fornication must also be instilled in them. And this applies even more so to our sons. They must be taught to respect the opposite sex from a Godly manner and look forward to someday being gifted of Yah, a Godly wife, and enter into a loving marriage. They must be taught to abhor fornication and adultery. Taught to be God-fearing and unwaveringly obedient to Yah and His Ways. To love Yah with their whole being and their neighbor as themselves (Deuteronomy/Devarim 6:5; Matthew 22:37-39; Leviticus/Vayiqra 19:18).

 

Final Thoughts and Reflections

 

Beloved, we’ve only scratched the surface of this content-rich reading today. I pray that this study has given you the spiritual nourishment that will carry you throughout the coming week and that we all heed the Yeshua-focused Torah living life lessons contained therein. That we take seriously our call to be watchmen and to speak the Truth to this corrupt and dying world.

 

Shabbat Shalom. Shavu’tov. Be blessed fellow saints in training.