Can Messianics Attend Same-Sex Weddings and Similar Social Events?
Often we’re asked to attend same-sex weddings and similar social events. But are we permitted to attend and participate in such social activities as disciples of Yeshua Messiah? We discuss this critical issue in this installment of TMTO.
The Billion Dollar Question
We recently received a question from a listener of this program, asking if Messianics/Netzari/Rooters are prohibited from attending homosexual weddings.
Now, without getting into the specific circumstances prompting this listener’s question, so as to not in any way reveal their identity, the listener’s dilemma was real and troubling to their spiritual sensibilities and convictions.
So given the pervasiveness of same-sex unions in our western societies, and the fact that it’s a good chance that each of us will at some point in our walk with Mashiyach have to confront a specific homosexual situation. Be it:
- Being invited to a homosexual wedding;
- Having to deal with a homosexual relationships in our family or circle of friends; or work and careers;
- Or simply having to navigate western society’s enthusiastic acceptance and embracing of same-sex-unions/relationship.
The hard and fast answer to this question and situation is simply NO.
Messianics Are Compelled Not To Attend Such Events
As set-apart disciples of Yeshua HaMashiyach, we cannot have anything whatsoever to do with same-sex-unions/relationships.
3 Reasons Why Messianics Must Not Attend Same-Sex-Union Social Events
Now, there are 3-reasons that ccome to mind why Netzari/Rooters/Messianics must have nothing to do with same-sex-unions.
Father Views Homosexuality as an Abomination
Torah strictly forbids homosexuality. And thus by default, Torah prohibits any and all same-sex-relationships/unions.
In fact, Father views such relationships as abominable (Leviticus 18:22; 20:13).
So heinous a sin is homosexuality in the eyes of the Creator that the committing of this sin is grounds for summary execution. Now, why would something like same-sex-unions/relationships be viewed as abominable and worthy of execution, while other sins not?
Homosexuality Corrupts and Defies the Creator’s Natural Order
Simply put: homosexuality corrupts and defies the Creator’s natural order. Those sins that corrupt and defy Father’s natural order are especially problematic and intolerable to Him.
Recall the story of the Watchers who left their natural (although more accurately their supposed spiritual) state and mated with women (Enoch 2). The watchers’ corruption and defiance of YHVH’s created order resulted in them, according to the Apostle Peter, being:
“…kept in everlasting chains under darkness unto the judgment of the Great Day (Jud. 1:6).
The key mitzvah against same-sex-unions is found in Leviticus 18:22 and reads as follows:
You shall not lie with a male as with a woman; it is an abomination. (Lev 18:22 ESV)
Now, when we step back and examine the beginning of the chapter (for context sake), we find in verses 3 through 5 verbiage that, in my opinion sets the tone for the mitzvah (I.e., the prohibition of verse 22). It reads:
“After the doings of the land of Mitsrayim (aka Egypt), wherein ye dwelt, shall ye not do: and after the doings of the land of Kena’an (aka Canaan), whiter I bring you, shall ye not do: neither shall ye walk in their ordinances. Ye shall do no judgments, and guard my ordinances, to walk therein: I am Yahuah Elohaykem. Ye shall therefore guard my statutes, and my judgments: which if a man do, he shall live in them: I am Yahuah” (Cepher).
Ancient Egyptian Homosexuality History
Homosexuality in ancient Egypt is a hotly debated subject among egyptologists and historians. However, certain Egyptian relics are highly suggestive that homosexuality was accepted in ancient Egyptian society. And to add to the suspicion, Talmudic literature suggests that ancient Egypt was known for her sexual debauchery. Maimonides refers to lesbianism as “the acts of Egypt” (Wikipedia).
But Isn’t Torah Silent on Lesbian Unions?
Indeed, some may point out that Torah does not mention same-sex-unions between women at all. Interestingly, one will find very very little content on the Internet that touches upon this issue. Some sites go so far as to say that any homosexual and or lesbian relationship is within the bounds of biblical permissiveness on the basis that the Law has been done away with; or that God restricted only men from having such abominable relationships; or that Father is only prohibiting homosexual relationships that occur outside the boundaries of a man-woman marriage relationship. Supporters of this last point will go on to, of course, sanction marriage for same-sex couples, even within the so-called Church.
The fact that Father admonished us to not engage in the things that our former taskmasters engaged in Leviticus 18:3-5, and then for the remainder of the chapter He lays out a laundry-list of non-sanctioned, prohibited sexual relations mitzvot (I.e., laws and commandments) is highly indicative of Father’s disdain for the way the Egyptians conducted their sexual lives. And in so delineating chapter 18’s laundry-list of deviant behavior, it is biblically safe to conclude that what was good for the goose in Father’s righteous eyes for each mitzvah was equally good for the gander.
So for certain individuals to assert that YHVH was addressing only gay men or only addressing married men who engaged in homosexual activity outside the bonds of their marriage is outright foolishness. The prohibition against homosexuality as it relates to both genders is undeniable. At the very least, Father indicated that He would not stand for His chosen people to follow after (ma’aseh; to do or imitate) the various relational customs of the Egyptians.
The companion verse to this verse (I.e., 18:22) is found in Leviticus 20:13. To me it confirms that the only sanctioned sexual unions are those between a man and a woman. Period. So the fact that Abba did not specifically prohibit lesbian unions is not in any conceivable way or manner an indication that lesbianism is a sanctioned relationship in the eyes of our Holy and Righteous Creator. In fact, any homosexual union or relationship is an abomination in the eyes of the Almighty (Lev. 18:22b).
What Good For the Goose is Also Good For the Gander
Despite Torah being silent on the issue of female same-sex relationships, the Apostle Paul clearly speaks out against both lesbianism and homosexuality in Romans 1. For in verse 26 he touches upon women exchanging natural sexual relations with unnatural sexual relations. He touches upon this in context of the Creator giving human beings up to pursue their degrading, lustful passions. As it relates to those who pursue such unnatural experiences and acts, they have no chance of inheriting the Kingdom of God (1 Cor. 6:9; 15:50; Rev. 21:8; Gal. 5:21).
Only Between a Man and a Woman Equals YHVH’s Definition of Marriage
But one is hard-pressed, with all of the excuses that are given, to effectively refute the Creator’s commandment defining marriage as being exclusively between a man and a woman:
“Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his WIFE: and they shall be one flesh” (Gen. 2:24).
The definition of marriage is non-negotiable and really non-debatable.
When studying Torah as it relates to Yah’s definition of marriage, it is always contextually wise to go back to the original instructions given to man regarding marriage covenants and unions that strictly define marriage being between a man and a woman.
I go even further: I believe that Leviticus 18:22 and 20:13, by the spirit of the commandment, extends over to women as well. These by default prohibit female same-sex-relationships. The context by which Torah was originally given presumed at the outset that the Creator’s intended marriage structure was to be only between a man and a woman (Mat. 19:6).
And as it relates to Yah’s established man-woman marriage relationship, the head of the household is the man (Eph. 5:23—For the husband is the head of the wife even as Mashiyach is the head of the church (I.e., the Assembly…). The man is responsible for both the spiritual and physical wellbeing of his family.
Now this does not in any way mean that husbands are to rule over their wives. It simply means that YHVH’s intended structure for the family is for the wife to walk alongside her husband and be a help-meet (I.e., a partner) for him (Gen. 2:18), but the ultimate decision maker for the family unit must be the husband.
I wrote all this to say: if we as Torah Observant Believers in Yahoshua Messiah attend such a thing as a same-sex wedding (or any such social event), our very presence by default would lend full consent to the illegal (Torah illegal) wedding and marriage act.
So What Then?
So what does this have to do with any disciple of Messiah attending a same sex wedding or social event? Are we responsible for our brothers’ and sisters’ actions? Aren’t they responsible for their own salvation and how they live their lives?
Yes, indeed people are responsible for their own salvation (i.e., life choices that may prohibit their salvation) and living out their lives the way they so choose. However, we can only do our part to share with them God’s Truth and hopefully turn their hearts to God through Yeshua Messiah. Beyond that, as YHVH’s elect, we cannot commune nor socialize with homosexuals.Period.
Paul admonished the Corinthian believers to “come out from among them (i.e., those that are evil doers) and be separate from them” (2 Cor.6:17). So, if we consider ourselves set-apart (i.e., holy unto YHVH our Elohim), we must be separate from those that practice lawlessness. Father has called us to be holy and not be associated with that which is unholy. And I think you’d agree that any homosexual/lesbian wedding, marriage or social event would be an unholy thing to be a part of. Thus we must not participate in such things. Which brings me to my 3rd point:
The Evil Spirit Associated with Homosexuality
I believe homosexuality is tied to an evil spirit.
The Physician Luke made reference to a “spirit of infirmity” that had plagued a particular woman for some 18-years (Luk. 13:11). Upon seeing this woman, who was bent over and could not fully straighten herself, Master called out to her (vs. 12). Now, Luke does not record that Master healed the woman from her debilitated condition. No. Luke records Master as telling that woman that she had been “set free from her disability.”
So it would not be too much of a stretch to extend over into the spirit realm any condition that is not of YHVH, such as homosexuality. And like the woman who was freed of her condition by Yahoshua HaMashiyach, homosexuals do not require heeling from their condition, but actually deliverance. They need to be freed from the bondage that is confining them to a state of unnatural affections and behavior.
A Matter of Spirit and Truth
Our Master told the Samaritan Woman at Jacob’s Well that YHVH is a Spirit; and any that worship Him must do so in Spirit and in Truth (Joh. 4:23, 24). This would go without saying, that any human activity that is abominable in the eyes of the Creator and is not of Yah is tied to an evil spirit.
It doesn’t take a genius to figure out that YHVH’s elect are not to be in the company of evil spirits. If anything, Yah’s elect should be casting those demons out of the affected people by the name of Yahoshua HaMashiyach and the power and might of the Ruach HaKodesh. To hob-knob and elbow rub with others at same sex social activities, including weddings, would only be inviting communion with evil spirits.
Thus we are obliged to avoid such activities and individuals that are following ungodly life practices as Paul wrote in 2 Corinthians 6:17. This, of course, is because ungodly individuals are being led, influenced, and often embodied by demons. And those demonic spirits can affect other unsuspecting souls whenever they come into their presence.
A social event such as a same-sex wedding let’s say, most likely will have tied to it an ungodly spirit that no well-meaning Messianic/Rooter/Netzari should be exposed to.
My Personal Experience
I’ve recently come to realize, for myself that is, that I cannot watch certain forms of entertainment as I used to. I am a huge fan of spy and action movies and shows. Turns out that many of these shows have attached to them evil, ungodly spirits that can influence my soul through the entry points of my eyes and ears. And since our bodies are the Temple of the Most High here upon this earth, we must not permit anything that is ungodly to penetrate and enter into these temples of ours (1 Cor. 3:16, 17).
In fact, it was Paul who wrote to the same Corinthian Assembly:
“What harmony can there be between the Messiah and B’liya’al? What does a believer have in common with an unbeliever? What agreement can there be between the temple of God and idols? For we are the temple of the living God-as God said, ‘I will house myself in them…and I will walk among you. I will be their God, and they will be my people’” (2 Cor. 6:15, 16; CJB).
For our God requires a set-apart, sacred and pure dwelling in which to inhabit. If our temples are compromised by ungodly things, Father will not dwell therein. So I had to stop watching most of the things that I used to enjoy, so that I may maintain a set-apart, undefiled dwelling place for my Father. Participating in a same-sex-union or social event would invite ungodly spirits to have contact with us and taint these temples of ours.
Every Believer Must Be Convinced in their Own Minds
I’m certain there will be those who will assert that Messianics/Rooters/Netzarim are supposed to love homosexuals and not shun them away.
Indeed, we are to love one another. There are too many passages in the Brit haDashah that instruct Netzari to love one another and to love one’s neighbor. And as it would relate to homosexuals, I truly believe we are compelled to love them unconditionally.
However, being one who tries to stay away from cliches and catch phrases, this one I fully believe most appropriately applies to every believer as it relates to how we must treat homosexuals:
“Love the person, hate the sin…”
Of course, every Believer must be convinced/persuaded in their own mind of these things (Rom. 14:5) Each Believer must walk out their individual Faith with fear and trembling (Phi. 2:12).
This walk is in no means an easy walk. And often, Father places such things as this in our lives to test us and see if we will remain true to His call. So your decision on this matter must be weighed in accordance with Scripture and the leading of the Holy Spirit. And then, Trust Father that He will bless and lead you to His glory and honor.
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